Before the age of the internet, adoption agencies used to employ something called “Blue Books” which were huge 3” binders for photos and brief descriptions of kids who were free for adoption in your area. Now, with internet photolistings, we can view dozens of photos and profiles with just one click. A photolisting is a web page that shows photos of children who are looking for an adoptive family. These children/youths are usually older, are in sibling groups, or have physical or developmental disparities. Adoption agencies list these children with a court-ordered release.

The Photo

The photo is your first connection to a child.

You can tell a lot about a child through one simple photo: the eyes, the smile, the way the child is groomed and presents himself. If an adoption agency is creative enough, they will use a variety of different backgrounds with the children engaging in a variety of different activities. The photo is supposed to draw you in and spurs your imagination so that you make an emotional connection. This will lead you to the second step.

The Profile

The profile is a short bio on the child. It presents only basic information on the child. An adoption agency does not put any information about birth families on the website, and only minimal information about the child to protect everyone’s privacy. There is enough info in the profile to start a mental file on the child, including: first name, ages, strengths, and talents, whether they are legally free for adoption, and any disqualifying information such as, “should be the youngest child in the home” or “should be placed in a two-parent home.” Finally, there is contact information that should be followed up on by the family’s social worker.

The Follow Up

This is the most important step in the photolisting. If interested, the family’s social worker contacts the child’s social worker for more information. These social workers then exchange the family’s home study and the child’s personal information. The child’s social worker peruses the home study to ensure the family can meet the needs of the child. The family, with the assistance of their social worker, reviews the child’s information to make sure there are no red flags. If both parties agree to proceed, then next steps are chosen, which differ from state to state, county to county.

An adoption photolisting search can be fun. It can also be frustrating if there are unrealistic expectations. But with the right guidance, and with the correct information disclosed upfront, this process can turn from a simple photo to a placement in a forever family for a child.

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My husband and I had just finalized adoption on our three kids only six months prior, and we weren’t looking to adopt again so soon. However looking at their picture, and putting faces to real little people who were in need of a family stirred something inside me. These babies, only two and three, were already out of the age window of what many families want to adopt. They needed a family to love them and nurture them. Could we be that family?

My husband and I were an inactive foster family, having put our license on hold after we finalized adoption on our other kiddos. We still had an active home study. That made the next part of the process so much easier.

After discussing it thoroughly with each other, we emailed our agency and asked if they could submit our home study for that sibling group. We didn’t think we would be selected, for a laundry list of reasons, but we figured we should at least try.

Every day or two I’d look up their listing to see if it had changed. It hadn’t. The beautiful blue, solemn eyes of my now daughters stared out at me and connected with my heart. I found myself longing to brush their long, strawberry blonde hair, kiss their sweet cheeks, and hold their dear little bodies on my lap. I wondered how they were doing and if they had a family yet. Were they happy? So many questions.

Several months after submitting our home study, we received an email from the girls’ caseworker listing some of the children’s more negative behaviors. They asked if we’re still interested. After a family conference, we decided we still were if the placing caseworker was interested in us. Several emails and a meeting with caseworkers later we found ourselves face-to-face with the little girls from that first picture. It was love at first meeting.

Happily, we finalized the adoption of our girls in December of 2017. I am so glad we saw their picture that day. While our days are busier than they used to be, and we are still adjusting to new behaviors, it is clear that these girls were meant to be our family.

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An adoption photolisting site looks very much like browsing a catalog for items that are on sale. The pictures of a smiling child with a glowing description to outline their best qualities, in short, to make them more marketable. Adoptive parents search through this catalog to find the child they like most simply by a picture and an embellished description. This perception alone would make anyone feel uneasy.

Aside from the disturbing marketing qualities, photolistings often divulge too much about a child, not taking into account their right to privacy. Many of these children are often school age and have to deal with other children knowing that they are in the foster system. These photolistings may also mention special needs and other private information that a child is simply not old or aware enough to consent to this practice. Many of these photolistings are on the internet and will continue to follow a child as they grow and are more aware of this invasion of privacy.

There is really no question that adoption photolistings are not without fault. The invasion of privacy and the marketing nature of these listings is clearly not sound and even could be described as unethical, however, adoption photolistings work. While the marketing approach seems unsettling, raising awareness is one of the few productive ways that children are adopted, especially older children. Photos are a tool that is used to ignite an emotional response. When a prospective adoptive couple sees a child’s photo, it tugs at the heart-strings. The glowing yet sob description can elicit sympathy and a call to action.

These photolistings don’t just exist because it is the only option. They exist because the creators of these listings know that they work. Even though it might seem obvious that these listings are not fail proof, it is a matter of balancing negative and positive. The pros of a child finding an adoptive family simply outweigh the unethical platform through which this exposure is achieved.

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Please note: adoption photolistings are usually secure sites. The information provided is limited and, at times, so are the pictures of the children. The majority of the sites require you to have a completed home study. From my experience, your foster care home study will work also. Either way, the sites will contact your adoption agency for verification. This is for the protection of the children who are waiting.

Adoption.com

This site has a great photolisting. Adoption.com has listings of children from across the nation and also has tons of other information that will be of great use to the foster care and adoption community. The site touches on all subjects, providing resources for adoptees, birth mothers, foster parents, and adoptive parents. Visit the site, and you will find tabs for their Reunion Registry, Professional Services Directory, and a place where birth mothers are able to create a profile to find families for their children. Hopeful adoptive parents are also able to create a profile on the site’s Parent Profiles feature. They also provide articles that focus on a variety of experiences and issues in the foster care and adoption world.

Heart Gallery of America

The majority of states have their very own Heart Gallery. The Heart Gallery features waiting children in your state who need adoption. The photos are beautiful and capture the personalities of children who are available for adoption. You can easily google your states Heart Gallery by typing in “Heart Gallery” then your state’s name.  

The Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption

Boy, do I love Wendy’s! Not only is this food delicious, but the dedication to helping children find forever homes is even more satisfying. Wednesday’s Child has profiled many of our children here in the United States which eventually helps them find permanent homes. Often, Wednesday’s Child has raised a child’s chances of finding a permanent home due to their stories being shared on a national media platform. The founder of Wendy’s, Dave Thomas, was adopted himself, which makes this mission extra special. The foundation also offers grant opportunities for other nonprofits who are here to serve the foster care and adoption community. Visit their site for more information.

Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption | Foster Care Adoptionhttps://www.davethomasfoundation.org

Local Nonprofit Organizations

Many of the nonprofits in your area are responsible for their own photolistings of children they have been assigned in order to raise awareness of them needing permanent homes. While these organizations are raising awareness, they also provide children with many resources and opportunities throughout each year. It is for this reason that it’s important to give what you can when you can. For example, take Connecting Hearts based out of Richmond, Virginia. This organization was started by an adoptee by the name of Debra “Debbie” Johnston in hopes to bring more awareness to children in foster care who are in need of permanent homes in Virginia. Not only does her organization provide a photolisting, but it also provides different normalcy programs like birthday bags, Christmas toy drives, school supplies drives, and so much more in the name of providing for children in foster care who are waiting to be adopted. So support your local organizations as much as you can and donate to www.connectingheartsva.org if you can, to support Virginia’s children.

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So why use a photolisting website?

1. A visual connection with the child

There is something about the visual that connects us to people. That’s why Facebook and Match.com have been such a success! We, as humans, are more drawn to people if we can see their faces or see them in their natural environment. A photolisting is your first connection to a child that you wish to adopt. You can tell a lot about a child through one simple photo: the eyes, the smile. If an adoption agency is creative enough, they will use a variety of different backgrounds with the children engaging in a variety of different activities. The photo is supposed to help you get an idea of what the child likes or dislikes and may give you a taste of his or her personality.  

2. Taking the next step

After you narrow down the 2-3 children or sibling groups that you are interested in, the next step is finding out more about the child. Photolisting web pages only provide a small profile on the child such as what the child likes to eat, what extracurricular activities he or she enjoys, etc. You will need more detailed information and will need to ask questions like the following: what are his special needs? Will she do well with younger children in the home? Does he have behaviors that you need to be aware of? Was there any prior abuse or neglect? This information will not be listed in the profile. You will need to contact the child’s social worker for more detailed information. Your adoption agency or your attorney can assist in this area. Click here for a list of agencies and attorneys by state.

3. A good way to promote your own family

Lastly, a photolisting website is a great way to promote your own family! If it is a good website, they will help you create your own Parent Profile. On your page, you can post family photos, videos, and a short profile of your family. The purpose of promoting your family is to give the birth mother the power to be actively involved in placing her child in the family of her choice. This is incredibly empowering and takes away the fear of “giving up” a child to a total stranger. That barrier is removed with Parent Profiles.

A photolisting search can be fun. It can also be frustrating if there are unrealistic expectations.  But with the right guidance and with the correct information disclosed upfront, this process can turn from a simple photo to a placement in a forever family for a child.

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1. In Alberta, Canada and America, there is a television advertising campaign called “Wednesday’s Child” that appeals to forever homes for children waiting to be adopted. As of 2015, 70 percent of the children featured on Wednesday’s child has been adopted.
2. The Adoption Council of Canada started a national database in 1997 that includes photos of adoptable children. Since 1997, over 833 children have been adopted from that database.
3. In the United States, it is estimated that there are two million couples waiting to adopt. This means that for every one adoption, there are 36 families. In a study done in 2002, about 57% of women facing infertility problems consider adoption.
4. In America, there are currently 4,000 children in foster care and 1,000 of those waiting to be adopted. Why so many? Many children and teenagers enter foster care with a history of abuse, neglect, or abandonment and are unable to continue living safely with their biological families. 
5. Each year 20,000 youth will age out of the foster care system. Children who age out of the system are at risk for being unemployed, homeless, and poorly educated. Photolistings are a great way to bring foster children into forever homes.

These are just a few of the statistics found on adoption photolistings. If you are considering adoption, begin your search on adoption photolistings to complete your forever family.

For more information check out:

http://www.nationalpost.com

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1. Use current photos. Many photolistings have old information and photos of children. This can be misleading to prospective adoptive families who have certain type of children in mind.
2. Make sure you use a professional photographer who knows how to take advantage of lighting and background. These types of photos are more inviting and make capture more attention.
3. Make sure the children are well groomed and appropriately dressed.
4. Have children smile or engage in a particular activity during the photo or video that makes him or her smile. Families are more interested in children who look friendly to be a part of their families. 
5. Have positive information about the children. List what he/she is interested in, their favorite school subject, favorite animal, etc. This forms an immediate emotional bond with prospective families who have similar interests.
6. When trying to place siblings together, use pictures of them individually and together. This captures the closeness between siblings.
7. Use every social media avenue available: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc.
8. Make photolistings on social media shareable.
9. Showcase one child or sibling group per day or week.
10. Use multiple accounts or websites to showcase photolistings.

For more information please visit:

Foster Care Statistics

Adoption Statistics

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The creation of photolistings has helped thousands of children find their forever homes over the years. Without the photos, I feel there would be more children waiting then there are now. Photolistings are very useful when it comes to the adoption of older children in foster care, especially from ages 8 and up. Naturally, the younger children do not last long on photolistings, but for our older children in care, a photolisting can be critical when searching for a forever home.

The adoption photolistings can reach more families than any social worker could on their own. National and state photolistings are able to reach more waiting families in different regions and states, which makes a child’s chances of finding a permanent home greater. Not only are sites using photos but now they are uploading videos. I think the videos add a nice touch to the child’s profile. The videos give an opportunity for potential families to see and hear the child, which could ultimately help them reach a final decision to inquire on that child.

Please note, the majority of the children listed on photolistings are considered “hard to place”, meaning they have suffered some severe trauma or could have some disabilities that may require extra care (which is not their fault). Remind yourself, just because the children on this list may be considered hard to place doesn’t mean they should be considered unadoptable in your eyes. It doesn’t mean they are incapable of receiving or returning the love. It means they have yet to find the right adult or family to help them reach their full potential. This person could be you, but you will never know until you give them a fighting chance.

Unfortunately, not everyone feels photolistings are the best way to find our children in permanent homes. Some feel a picture degrades the child and a paragraph about them reveals too much information. They feel that it leaves a child open to being bullied in school. Personally, I’ve never known any child to randomly start searching for foster care photolistings, but I digress.

Luckily, there are many effective ways to help our youth in foster care find permanent homes. With social media and the internet being the leading way for millions to gather information, having our children on photolistings seems very beneficial. There are numerous sites with photolistings available to you both locally and nationally. So, whether you are a hopeful adoptive parent or a seasoned adoptive parent go have a look at a few children in need of a home. Get involved.

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About a year later, I started to get more serious about growing our family. Still not knowing where to begin, I decided to renew my foster care license. Then one night, I began to do a little research about the process. That’s when I ran across my first photolisting. It was a local Heart Gallery with children in need of adoption from foster care. I was still new to this entire world of fostering from a parent’s perspective, I had grown up in Kinship Care with my grandmother, so my perspective has only been limited to that angle during that time. When I came across this Heart Gallery, I was blown away by how many children were listed! All these children were in my state looking for homes. Some were as young as three years old. My search not only helped me discover children in my state but another site had about a thousand or so children listed from across the country. Again, I’m floored by this new knowledge I’m suddenly gaining. All of these innocent faces I saw were without a permanent home. I began to ask questions (to myself). How can this be possible? Why so many children without permanent homes?

On the sites, there wasn’t much information about the child. You may or may not see a picture of the waiting youth but there is a nice write up about their hopes, dreams, and interests. You will also be able to see if they are looking for a two parent home or if they wish to be an only child. If need be, you could also choose a preferred ethnicity of the child you wish to adopt. After discovering the many options that photolistings had to offer, I decided to start locally. I began to make inquiry after inquiry. Sending my home study to different children caseworkers who could be a potential match for our family.

Initially, I thought using the photolisting would be rather easy. I was under the impression that all I had to do was click and wait for the calls from the workers to roll in. Boy, was I wrong! It turns out I had to do a little more work to get the information I needed about the children. My local Heart Gallery didn’t actually have contact information at the time, the only way I could gain information was by submitting a form. During my first search, I remember stumbling across a site with photolistings. This site has a sort of database where children can be listed from across the country. You need a completed home study to get complete access to the site. Then, the site will call your agency to verify your completed home study. After I gained access to the site, I was able to see even more children in my state who were in need of adoption. One of the features I loved about the site as I was able to access the child’s worker contact information. It provided which county the child was located, and the social worker’s name, email, and office number.

Now that I have access to phone numbers and emails, it was easier for me to follow up with workers on my inquiries. After hearing back from a few workers I wasn’t getting good matches for my family or call backs at all. Before I became discouraged, I decided to broaden my search a little to surrounding states. That’s when things started to look up. Workers began to actually start calling ME first. I would read over a few profiles that were sent over. Unfortunately, there were still no matches. A few months had passed and I began hearing from a particular social worker in Pennsylvania. It was a potential match that had recently entered a group home. The worker would contact my worker about every three months to see if I was available/interested in adopting this particular child. Of course I was, so I proceed to just wait for this child to be well enough to enter a family.

After a few months, the worker was finally ready to conduct an interview with me. We completed the interview through a Skype conference. After a few weeks I got the “OK” to go meet my match. We hit it off. Soon, I was visiting him bi-weekly and building a bond. After a few months of visiting him, I was able to bring him back home for a visit. The whole matching and moving process took about nine months. Guess what? All the hassle, hustle, and bustle was totally worth it. Using the photolisting site, I had to have made about eighty plus inquiries before finally getting matched. It was mentally exhausting. But, if it wasn’t for the photolisting being available, I wouldn’t have been able to grow my family. My heart is full and so is my house.

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If you have been called to adopt, bless you and congratulations! You are about to step into a lifelong journey that will forever change both your and your children’s lives. Now the big question: Just where are your children (or child)?

Domestic infant adoptions are on the rise, and while there is always a need for the newly placed baby, we often forget about those children that are hard to place or special situations. What about those? Have you been called to adopt the waiting child? The hard situation? The special needs child? All are waiting for their family. And that family may just be you. Every child no matter the age or situation that wants a home should and can have a home.

My husband and I set out five years ago to adopt a baby or young child. During the home study process, we were asked to complete a paper that listed all situations we would consider. This included special needs, drug exposed, older children with emotional or physical needs, the kids known as “the waiting child.” At that time, we turned down any special needs because we just felt we didn’t have the ability to care for a child in that situation. We especially did not want to consider any child with a heart condition since we lost our son, William to a heart condition as an infant. We didn’t think we could re-live the same situation all over again. So sadly we said, no.

I’m so glad that God saw the future and melted our hearts and even hid some of the unknown. Otherwise, we would not have our beautiful children with us today. He clearly had His hands all over our adoptions, and now I cannot imagine our lives any other way.

The adoption of our son, Nathan came as a little bit of a surprise. Born on our daughter’s first birthday, Nathan entered the world via a traumatic delivery and was not breathing. After being resuscitated, he was transferred to another hospital where he was diagnosed with a condition called, HIE or Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy. In other words, the lack of oxygen to his brain was long enough that he qualified for a new treatment called, “brain cooling.” His body temperature was lowered enough to allow damage to his brain to stop. Seventy-two hours later, he was warmed, and we signed to become his parents. Now, if you Google HIE, you will see that it is scary. To make things even scarier, Nathan almost died a few times. He required surgery and during the pre-op examination, they discovered that he also had a heart defect.

Now isn’t that just like God? We said no to a child with a heart defect because we were all too familiar with heart defects and didn’t want to go through it again, but God knew that we were actually the perfect family for this little guy because of that very experience with our other son.

You see, not every family is suited for every situation, but there is a situation out there for every family. For our family, babies born addicted, babies born premature, and even babies with special needs and heart defects were the perfect match for our family.

The focus needs to shift from finding a child for a family to finding that perfect family for each child.

There is a family out there that is perfectly suited for each situation. There is a family out there that is looking for a child and may not know what options await. There are families that have the “know how,” background, or set up that would be perfect for bringing a waiting child home to be one of their own to grow, to heal, to thrive.

The special situation, the special needs, or the waiting child can be clouded in fear, but that does not mean that these children are not adoptable. Every child, whether adopted or not, goes through moments that can be challenging and downright scary. But we equip ourselves with knowledge, with open arms and hearts, and we welcome them home. Because God created each of us unique and special. And maybe, just maybe, you are uniquely perfect for that child out there just waiting for you to bring them home.

Resources to research:

The Connected Child by Dr. Karyn Purvis offers wonderful insight and education to parent children from all situations adopted or biological. Video is also available on YouTube.

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